This is totally a first-world problems post, by the way. Basically just getting some shit out of my system.
Netflix: Why did you take away King of the Hill?
I started watching KOTH on Netflix waaaayyy after it was completed, and I fell in love. I'd avoided it because I have bad memories of catching an episode of Beevus and Butthead at an impressionable age, so I avoided anything by the same creator (Mike Judge). I was so wrong. This show is so amazing, so witty, so full of heart, so character-driven. I could write love ballads to this show - at least about seasons 1-5. Because in the middle of my feverish catching up, I logged on only to find it was gone, poof! Just like that, no warning. For a few minutes I wondered if life was even worth living. Also, this show is, bar-none, the hardest to find on the internet. Why can't I just get free TV shows that are off the air at the touch of a button? It's so unfair.
My mom talked to me on the phone last night about the Atlanta "snow storm." She was shocked that I hadn't heard about it. I refrained from saying that people in other parts of the country don't keep tabs on which Southern cities got a light dusting of snow and freaked out about it. (That said, yes, it was very tragic how a totally-preventable catastrophe happened because no prep-work was done. But really. Two inches people.)
On the other hand, I remember what it was like to know nothing about snow/ real winter. The first time I traveled "up north" (i.e. above North Carolina) I asked my then-boyfriend what the big mounds of white stuff were. The answer "salt" told me nothing.
Some women get confidence from wearing dresses and skirts, and that's great. I affirm you! (Not that it matters, you're an adult, carry on). Apparently I'm not one of those women. I hate buying pants so much that I avoided it until reality hit: it's 9 degrees outside, and I only skirts to wear to work. Not OK. Thankfully the pants gods were smiling on me and I found a pair at TJ Maxx in record time. And lo and behold, it was life-changing! I felt so much more productive at work the next day, probably because I could move around without worrying that I'd flash somebody.
Speaking of modesty, I am radically relative about it. The whole hand-wringing, angsty "will some man stumble because my knees are showing" attitude is the epitome of wasted time. Seriously, it is the definition of meaningless. There are men with fetishes for everything, and no way am I spending a second of my time trying to read their minds. And for goodness' sake stop judging people at church based on their clothes. You have no idea what kind of day they're having that prompted the stained shirt and jeans, and it's none of your business.
That little rant changed nothing, but damn I feel better now.
One realization I had recently is that I deserve to exist. I'm the woman who apologizes when someone else steps on my toes on the metro. Why? Because someone needs to apologize, and if no one else does then I fill in the void. But I'm realizing just how messed up that is. I actually do deserve to exist, to take up space, to eat. Isn't it amazing how we women can be pro-life about everyone else except ourselves?