Gifts from Protestants: Hymnody

One of my tropes on this blog has been to rag on my evangelical background, and there's a lot of good material there. However, I have neglected to mention the good things. One of the best things that Protestant churches have to offer is their music.

To be clear, I'm not talking about this:

I'm thinking more about this:

Or this:

Or this:

If Catholics are looking for music to add to their repoirtoire, they could do worse than composers such as Charles Wesley, Isaac Watts, and the many anonymous authors of Negro Spirituals. Of course some lyrics may have to be tweaked for doctrinal reasons, but there is a wealth of musical and lyrical talent buried in the typical Protestant hymnal.

On another day I'll tell you why Protestants have such a rich history of music.

Seven Quick Takes: Why Scrubs is the Best Show Ever

1

My husband has always said so, and I scoffed until I watched it all the way through. And yes, it is the best show ever with the exception of MASH (similar shows though, in many ways). Check it (spoilers!):

2

The Janitor

Much has been said about the character simply known as "the Janitor," JD's arch nemesis. The actor tended to add-lib, to the show's general improvement.  The writers did not intend on him becoming a major character, but who can deny destiny? 

3

The Treatment of Sex

Let me be clear: it's not exactly a show I'd watch my grandma, and there's plenty of fornication to go around. However, the show's treatment of sex is different from that of most TV shows in the past decade or so, because it treats it seriously, as a part of life that changes your relationships and even who you are. When JD and Elliot decide to become "sex buddies," it backfires, and JD is faced with the fact that sex is tied to emotional attachment. When JD and Kim fool around but avoid actual intercourse, they are shocked to discover that Kim is pregnant, and JD must grapple with the burden of unexpected fatherhood. And one of the most beautiful scenes in the show is when Dr. Cox and Jordan realize that they have "grown up" and need real, genuine intimacy that is not hidden by sarcasm and irony.

4

Grief and Pain 

There are some episodes that hit me in the gut every single time and make me bawl. Others make me just quiet, thoughtful, in need of a walk alone outside. And just like real life, the mood can turn on a dime. This is one of my favorite instances of this technique:

5

Relationships within Families

Scrubs has a lovely way of delving into the characters' pasts without being Freudian or weird about it. The treatment can be subtle: Elliot has a truly dysfunctional past, as does Dr. Cox, but JD's past is a little more nuanced. Best of all, it shows how part of growing up is seeing our parents as people in their own right, not just how their lives affect ours. In this wonderful episode about parents, JD reflects on his father as a person separate from the father role: 

6

The Philosophy of Sickness and Death

Scrubs throws a light on this crazy world we live in, where death comes in sterile hospital rooms and patients die surrounded by medical personnel instead of their families. Scrubs talks about the elderly, dying pregnant mothers, suicides, the death of children, the fear of death, and the macabre humor that medical staff must use to keep their sanity. One day, I want to have the perspective of this wonderful woman:

7

It is the funniest damn show ever

If you can't laugh at Scrubs, you are unconscious. It has something for everyone, whether you like snark or dry wit or slap-stick or pop culture references or relationships or just the zany craziness of life. And by the way, this show is considered the most realistic of all doctor shows, by other doctors. My father in law, a pediatrician, adores this show because it shows what it's really like for residents at public hospitals. Y'all, people complain about how much doctors make, but they deserve every penny. Consider the following: long hours, insane student loans, 4 years of med school, 4 years of residency with poverty-level pay, and unbelievable anti-law suit insurance. It is impossible to have your own practice in some states due to insurance rates (but that's a rant that I won't go into...).

So folks, appreciate your doctors. They have a hard job, especially now that folks go in thinking they know a lot because they looked on Web MD. Give them a card at Christmas or something, especially the pediatricians. There are bad doctors of course, but the good ones really care about their patients.

Seven Quick Takes: Taboo Stuff I Love

1. Snoop Dogg

Let's start this off with a bang shall we? (And oh, by the way, every single one of these takes is offensive in some way/ multiple ways. You have been warned). I always heard that Snoop Dogg was no talent. The naysayers are wrong. Yes, he's offensive in every single way - violence, sex, misogyny, etc. But he has got such a smooth flow, much better than Dr. Dre's. Everyone knows Gin and Juice, but Take it Back to '85 is much more fun: Make sure you're wearing headphones.  His best music was made when still producing music with Warren G (beautiful jazzy voice) and the rest of Death Row records. Yes, rap is music. Deal with it.

2. Eminem

I don't like his raps ironically. No, I sincerely like the early songs like The Real Slim Shady. Ask anybody in their mid-late twenties, and unless they're lying, they like it too. They'll bluff and beat around the bush and try to be all ironic, but don't be fooled. If it were to come on the radio and they were alone in the car, they'd start rapping it too, badly, with hand motions. Here are the lyrics, and they're clever.

3. Albert "Bert" "The Machine" Kreischer

My husband and I are big fans of stand up, and Albert Kreischer is possibly our favorite for live shows. He has a great stage presence and is able to improv like a pro - the sign of real stand up. While we were at a show in Baltimore in the summer, a group of rather trashy ladies were heckling, whooping, just being plain obnoxious, but he dealt with it with pizazz without becoming too crazy or having to throw them out. He started the show by throwing off his shirt and pouring whiskey all over himself; it was fantastic. What can I say, I like low-brow entertainment. (My moonshine making ancestors would be so proud.) His most famous sketch (which is actually fairly clean) concerns his escapades as a college study abroad student in 1990s Russia, and how he got mixed up with the Russian mafia. NOTE: I just listened to it again, and no, it is not clean. Not even a little bit.

4. Dave Chappelle 

Some people think he's racist. They are patently wrong. He is clever, and he is signifyin'.  I really wish I'd been here to see his show in D.C., his hometown. There are so many good clips of his that it was really hard to pick, but here are some of my favorites.

5. The Rocky Horror Picture Show

And with that, I just lost whatever audience I once had. Full speed ahead! If you don't know what I'm talking about, you really should be familiar with the pop culture reference Time Warp. "It's just a turn to the left...." Actually, I have no right to list this at all, since I've never been to a live showing and am therefore still a virgin. But I have such good memories of watching this on a tiny TV with my college friends and dancing the time warp. This is seriously the most offensive thing on this list though: it has the song "Sweet Transvestite" and ends in an orgy. It's also very clever though - a great riff on the 1950s drive in sci-fi movies.

6. Eddy Izzard

Speaking of transvestites (I don't get to use that phrase much...). Eddy Izzard is a cross-dressing British stand-up comedian with a great delivery and hilarious jokes. This is my favorite version of the American vs. British culture pieces.

7. South Park 

This show is popular for a reason: it's the best satire on the market. And what's even better is that it bucks the trend of riffing only on conservatives: primarily it destroys liberal sacred cows. In that attribute, it's virtually alone amongst TV shows. This was the only show with the nerve to say that Americans love Walmart because of greed, not that Walmart was some monster by virtue of existence. They even had the audacity to attack the hypocrisy of obese anti-smoking advocates, which is unthinkable today. They can show subtle balance though too: the brilliant post 2008-election episode called "About Last Night" (which was in fact produced that night) hit the nail on the head regarding fans of both parties. As for the actual candidates, well, I won't give it away.

Y'all, they even mocked Muhammad in the brilliant two-part saga Cartoon Wars (which the creators discuss here). It's like they have a death wish or something. Comedy Central refused to allow them to include an image of Muhammad just standing there, and the episode ends with a supposed creation of terrorists mocking America, Jesus, and the flag with feces.  The irony is golden: look what we're allowed to put about America and Christianity. Seriously, nobody talks this way; how do they get away with it?

Hannah Montana, Coon Repellent

Gettin jiggy with it 

I'm always the last one to the party, but there may be 5 or 6 people more behind the times than I am.* And for those 5 or 6 people, here is the best thing on Youtube since S**t Southern Women Say:

Meet Mark Brown and his pet raccoon as they cut a rug:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h8rnHXV7A8Q

Mark admits that the critter bites, but he considers it an occupational hazard. Besides, he has the perfect solution:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=13cS7oQwCHc

And he has the perfect rejoinder for those who mock his Hannah Montana body spray:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C3gqTxMHZzw


It's bold but sassy, y'all.



*Thanks to Simcha Fisher, where I learned about this treasure.